Ho Hum

That’s my boy

   Red is at the groomers today.  I miss my little bestie.  So my whole morning feels dreary despite bright sunshine, also because temperatures are extremely cold and because my whole body feels like I’ve been run over. I did my grocery shopping after I dropped Red off, also fatiguing when it usually energizes me to be out among people and good things to eat early .  Then too I may not have drunk enough caffeine, having delayed my morning “decaffeinated” tea ‘til elevenish.  Whatever the combination of factors I feel dull and achy. No perky pup or centering exercises to pull me out of it yet. Body sensing feels odd and silly distractions interrupt concentration on work in these conditions, especially this low grade overall body pain.  I’ll bet I’m the only one who knows that—ha!

     Webinar was really good last night, as our new mix of people discussed BT chapters 8&9, very complex including the nature of humanity and the creation and meaning of Loonderperzo and Anulios in Gurdjieff’s cosmos. You will never fathom the gist of this tale in one lonesome reading.

     Baruch emailed us more info about amber this morning, a very romantic Scandinavian story about Odin’s daughter. Freya somehow drove away her husband and her punishment was to wear a necklace by Loki the rest of her life and to weep tears of gold on the earth and amber on the sea if they dropped that far. 

     Now I need to read that whole myth and locate my amber necklaces.  Guess I have the time to do it if I can whomp up the energy. Tomorrow is another day.  I hope.

Calm after the. Storm

 Love my wind spinner— Color and sparkles!

     I think I’ve said most of what I need to in the sandy ‘s shift post. Catch me later if I change my mind 

Roots

 

Bob, Columbia White, Mary Helen Bryant, Nolan WVa c 1943

     Won’t say much yet. Mom with her good friend (sister in law) and youngest brother, presumably at home,! A company shanty in a coal town.

Holding pattern

future insertion in case Google won’t let me

Chihuly Exhibit 2006 Columbus 

Snow and plenty of it

 

JP hard at work, at crack of dawn at 8-10 F

     So far feels like a normal ME snowstorm.  We’re not planning any trips out today, but I think all the excitement was that the system covered almost the whole country.  

      It would be great if it dampened  the chaos in the so-called sanctuary cities, which are phenomenally noisy and provocative pockets of anti-Federalism, but not States’ Rights advocates, using an old traditional framework. They seem to fancy themselves Revolutionaries or kind hearted defenders of the downtrodden.  OK by me, if they keep it indoors and within legal ways and means. And if don’t start  a New Civil War driven by TDS.  

      Well, I did not know I’d be addressing this subject again this morning.  Must be perturbations of my peace of mind —or as some friends would denominate it, “white privilege.”  Could be a touch of cabin fever. Or maybe all this snow is today’s white thing, propping up my unearned privileges.

     Oooh. That sounds bitter.  I’ll let it stand, since irony is my target.  But my ironies go over heads.  For instance, L called me petty and mean in a text yesterday. I acknowledged it and forwarded the “Bargaining” post, which was likely unread.  Me indulging yet another WP.  

      Here’s the real irony:  I like to talk, actually converse, ie not just hear myself. I’m good at it. But no one engages with me. Practically no one,  that is, except 4-5 webinar friends. I can tell. You can measure my verity, too, by checking out the number of comments on my blog: One, weeks ago.  Yes, I’ve sent invites to follow this to many friends and relatives.

     Nonetheless, I’m talking to myself.  How many of us do that?  Are we aware we do it?  I can think of one, who cracks my heart, and she’s not a singleton, just the closest. She would say I don’t listen. I say I do; I just may not agree.  After all is said and done, listening is  partner to talking, sine qua non to conversation.  

    That’s all for the moment. I’m tired of talking to the void of my own silence.

Not the usual time for this

 

 

SB picture, Mt. Rainier

     This is so fabulous. Children playing sports in a majestic landscape.  What heaven ought to be?  Or how about normal life?  

      Nearly midnight now after an up and down day. Six phone calls to mostly stressed loved ones. No tv news today or tv, period. And it was good. But hours with phone clutched in hand, including now.  Have I become a lab animal pecking at keys all day, waiting for grain to drop?  Well, I did sweep and walk in snow, and I cooked beef roast with Yorkshire pudding for dinner. And C waded through 8 inches of snow with pup Nola this evening to visit all three of us.  That’s reality and normalcy anyway.  Thank you, Jesus!

Humdrum

     So I'm losing interest in doing this since I can't post pictures and I have to find a new blog spot, which I'm resisting because I don't want to bother with the technology crap. Hey! I found a way!  Yay! 

    

     As to humdrum, we had a drumming circle at PSC last night and all the rage was talk about ICE in our vicinity. "My husband got out his hunting rifle and sat in the window, cleaning it while I gave them the stinkeye when we saw them on our street." "They took five people from the hospital. A lot of people called in absent we're going to be shorthanded; of course mostly I feel concern for the ones who were taken." 

      

     I'm not an activist and I'm not anti-ICE, so there it is, and I'm already sick of being iced out in the weather and in the newspaper and on TV, now in local gatherings.  It’s all informative, but I don't admire the conscience warriors with their presumed hammerlock on virtue. By the way, why is the hospital hiring illegal aliens? And how can you think displaying a gun around an armed police force can't get you arrested or shot?  Do you have a martyr complex that you name conscience?

No pics again

s visited Wednesday night into Thursday night It was dramatic as usual also sweet she went to Boston to see an old professors art show and was able to talk to many of her former profs also took a lot of pictures of Boston in the sunny cold. Got a text that they already have 4 inches of snow and she's plowed before 6 AM plus bad snow conditions driving about 50 miles from home she made it safely though

Change is coming

     I so hate diddling with tech issues, like this Google refusal to access my photos. Looks like I need to scout out other blog apps and I dread it

More ducks

 

Guess not. Google will not let me access my photos. I’m done for now.

May need to start my blog on a new app I’ll let you know

I

Toys

 

Young F’s excellent snowman

My sparkly light show

Weather report

 

Original pic Pike’s Peak from son’ home, by SB

     Still snowing at home this morning, light and pretty with mild temps and no wind.  No complaints.

Edited versions, same photo, just using iPhone edit features

There’s got to be a morning after

 

Another morning after a snow day. Very beautiful in town and park.

     This day flew by.  We were expecting snow all day all over NE today…and tomorrow, but none so far, melting instead.  I took 115 pics today, so pleasant and pretty outside, and have spent considerable time editing them, ironically after demoing that process on SB’s pic of Pike’s Peak from her son’s home.  I will post them soon, but today’s plethora of home sights takes precedence.  

.

, 

Us deplorables

      

Where’s my snow? 1-16-26

Trip to Walmart with Red yesterday. Can’t believe I spent $115. Well, the frozen chicken pot pie and shepherds pie from Massachusetts were $28 and we got an armload of sugary stuff, which is certainly not cheap, then personal care products, also probably pricy which is a conundrum since costs less there than elsewhere. Does it tell me , anything about inflation?  Not really can neither of affirm nor deny government claims.

     Red was popular as ever there.  We went due to avoid cold windy weather, but stopped briefly at the park near sunset. 

     While loading our three bags in the car at the parking lot I smelled pot and thought, “Is my mind playing tricks on me?  here too?”  The car was in the handicap zone near the store’s door, and a crumpled-looking aging short woman with missing front teeth ambled towards us, smiling. She started chatting generally and I responded genially, then she got to a point:  would you sign petition for marijuana referendum.  “No.  Something in the newspaper about it….”  She tried to overcome my objections, but the one was, “ I don’t use it and I don’t care about it either way.”

     Boy oh boy, what we get for salesman these days,, but she’s got good technique if she could get her appearance smartened up!  Maybe Red could give her some pointers:)

     

Learning every day

 

Dream drawing, 1-30-17, happily gave it to a friend

     Yesterday was gray and wet. Today is sunny and cold. Both types of weather are good excuses for Red and meto stay indoors, it would seem. I’m contemplating taking the little guy shopping as well as attending PSC tonight for L’sl automatic writing and meditation session…and the pleasure of their company.

     The Oskiano sessions were exceptional.  Electric universe is SO engrossing, but look for it yourself—too complex for any synopsis from me. Ekant’s Practical Meditation brought really new techniques and insights into practice. I feel sorry for Workers who missed this experience.

Oskiano today

 For the teacher?  9-3-24

    Four hours to Work by studying.  First topic by Robin is The Electric Universe and the Work.  Elantra  conduct the second, PracticalMeditation.  These are always intriguing and engaging programs with my favorite electronic peops.  My only complaint is physical: sitting so long hardens all my joints even if stand up and move around. Oh well, no pain no gain?

   RS and Will would remind me this is a fine opportunityto practice sensing throughout.

Men at work

March 11, 2023 

                  But not me.  Not today. I'm so lazy, I can hardly stand myself.  Observe the automaton and weep.  

Irritating morning

   

6:42 am sunrise, 2-26-23  going to GA?

  Always gets back to computers, doesn’t it?  So convenient till they’re not. This time it’s the printer  12. Pages should not take an hour, but it seems to do that every time and for some reason will not print several of the pages. I need despite any efforts.  Woe is me?  Everybody’s problems should be this easy. Keep it all in perspective

It never gets old

January 12, 2020

     Sunset, I mean.  Even the ordinary out the back door down the driveway view warms the emotions with the flood of brilliant color and shadow. And to think we have an opportunity to enjoy it almost every day of our lives. What a connection to the cosmos and the creator!   

     Notice I’m not waxing so whatever about sunrise, which seems less brilliant, possibly because of the slow daily venture from sleep to consciousness. Still love those long morning shadows, blue skies and soft orange light on the trees of sunny days, and gray days cast their spell as well. 

     Can’t deny the major effect weather and planet on psyche of all living creatures, whether or not acknowledged.

Stay active

A new friend on the walk, Eddie with Red

     Days are routine, but occupied, especially by walks and visiting in person or by cell phone. Not much shopping or TV, glad to say. I’ve gained a couple of lbs so….

     

    Here’s an activity sample from Saturday:  Spoke to DJ an hour; what can be done is being done, and I am all the more thankful for competent, agreeable people. Talked football, A included.  I know folks who dislike the sport; I find it fascinating, including the game, the personalities, the industry.

    More:  I spoke to L, we agree to let go worry over M for now, since she’s with her sister for time being, and only they can initiate self help. 

  Corgi puzzle arrived in GA and was liked. My guilt feelings are assauged: a material Christmas gift tho late, is better than $$ alone.  

     Movements webinar started a new schedule last night, not without a hitch, but it will work better for all participants, including me.

    TTFN

What a mess

 

Me and Julio down by de skoolyard, redux

     So we get fabulous 44° temperatures and nasty walking conditions, water slush, ice, sand. Who could ask for anything more?

     Family conditions are comparable.  

Ugly

Fla sunset, 1-8-26, pic by SB

Me sunset, same time, my pic

Excellent coincidence 

      No, it’s not the sunset images that are ugly.  They, for me, are uplifting, especially after a harsh encounter on our 8 am walk.  I have been unfairly sending my husband out on the “early shift” with Red most of this frigid month, but he had an appointment, so Red was stuck with me.  

     The walk felt neutral, even pleasant, weather-wise and in regard to encounters with neighbors and motor traffic.  In fact we met up with the three youngsters awaiting the school bus, and young B the fast-growing boxer pup who lives by the bus stop.  Two more related guardians were there to chat, and that’s where “ugly” happened, after the bus pulled away and B boxer returned home with his mommy.

     Must admit to a rude thought: “She has always had the ugliest, down-turned expression on her face in all the years I’ve seen her, despite raising two angelic blonde princesses in thirty years, daughter and granddaughter.  I won’t even wonder why, only guess it has not been easy.”  Then as we all began to go our own ways, she said, “So sad about that little boy killed by a bus.” I ejaculated, “What? A schoolbus? Who? When, yesterday? Where, here?”  “Oh you haven’t heard,” and she filled me-us in with horrifying details plus an expectation for punishment of responsible parties.”  I literally felt sick to my stomach with sadness at it, and blurted, “Thanks for that, D.  Great way to start the day.”

    She recoiled, of course, and returned some stiff version of  “Sorry.”  At home the story was printed front page on the newspaper, and my stomach rolled over again, though I averted my attention.  Another admission here:  I realized my comment to her was itself ugly and unkind.  I am willing to let it lay, however, because of the sorrow I feel today with so much horror in the world augmenting  personal and familial suffering.

     

     

Skin in the game

 

     Had the annual dermatology exam this morning, nothing to worry about, pleasant banter with youthful looking Dr B and his nurses.  See you next year.  

     Took longish walk in parking lot back to car, sis L called with details of the hellacious sufferings in  two branches of the family this week.  It’s eating her up.  I could only recommend, be the still point in the hurricane.  Can’t offer answers if there’s no logic in the sufferers (or faith, which I neglected to say).  I, too, know her compulsion to say “do this” one time.  But then say it no more, because we also know that advice is turned back to attack the giver; the hand that would feed is bitten.  It must be human nature, a primary manifestation of Mr Gurdjieff’s upside down view of reality. 

BT p. 107

As regards their general ‘psyche’ itself and its fundamental

traits, no matter upon what part of the surface of their planet they

arise, these traits in all of them have precisely the same

particularities, among them being also that property of the three-

brained beings there, thanks to which on that strange planet

alone in the whole of the Universe does that horrible process

occur among three-brained beings which is called the ‘process of

the destruction of each other’s existence,’ or, as it is called on that

ill-fated planet, ‘war.’

          “Besides this chief particularity of their common psyche, there

are completely crystallized in them and there unfailingly become

a part of their common presences—regardless of where they may

arise and exist—functions which exist under the names ‘egoism,’

‘self-love,’ ‘vanity,’ ‘pride,’ ‘self-conceit,’ ‘credulity,’ ‘suggestibility,’

and many other properties quite abnormal and quite

unbecoming to the essence of any three-brained beings

whatsoever.

     I think I need another chocolate, please.

 

MJ and JP

 

Does Santa look a little high to you?   

    Yesterday while walking Red, I dropped off some ducats for JP’s 7 am snow shoveling at his grandma’s house.  I thought I caught a light whiff of skunkweed and considered, surely she’s not using; is he?  I shrugged it off and moved along after exchanging pleasantries with her, remembering , I seemed to smell pot everywhere in the neighborhood for several months now, even my own car.

     Mystery solved with another 7 am shoveling session.  I was awake this time and chatted a few with JP, starting with the ever popular topic of weather.

    “I was up at 3 am.” “Why?”  “Had to drive to Arundel to get a car out of a ditch.  He slid and landed deep in a bush.  Lucky not much damage, just a bent license plate.”  “That is lucky.  How did you haul him out, and why was he out so early?  Working?”  “Cables and wenches.  He was on his way to work.  He works for the medical marijuana grower where I get my weed.  He was on his way to trim it.  I met him there and got to know him.”  “Does your gram ever partake?”  “No. She gets her hits off cocoa. I tease her and say sometimes, ‘You know that’s three today.’”  We laugh,  and I tease, “We’re going to have to move her up to the hard stuff: three Lindt dark chocolate truffle balls a day.  Like me.”

     So chalk up one more house exhaling that odor.  That’s five households I can say from my own nose and sight use regularly/daily, but certainly more do.  I simply can’t parse which exactly on our walkies along our 3/4 mile stretch of about thirty neighborhood houses.  C and I often speculate from my driveway, do we smell skunk or skunkweed, even in snow cover?  And I wonder sometimes if that scent has somehow taken up residence in my outerwear or car or maybe in my nose.  

      If I sound prudish, I don’t think so, though I wouldn’t use marijuana.  Just shocked at how out there it
is after all the years of repression.  It is totally legal in my state, and, as JP observed, this stuff today is crazy. So strong.  

A right jolly old elf

 

OK, so I like gnomes

     In fact I Amazoned two more this size on Saturday, and I already have a dozen tiny ones plus 4 or 5 concrete outdoor guys.  Blame it on sister D, I think. She gifted me three irreplaceable garden lights, Alpine designs on spotted mushrooms, all gone now except one classic faded fellow atop his broken edged shroom…

    Damn.  I was done with this post and lost the whole thing, now I’m starting over which is not easy because of Errors like this. Anyhoo...,

 …shroom, last of my three treasured lights.  I favor the Alpine-togged fellows, aus dem Schwartzwald, but we must see their eyes.  Many modern gnomes wear hats over their eyes and have big billowy noses.  They hold no appeal for me, neither do naughty gnomes. We want to see kind helpfulness in their eyes and poses.  

    The irony is not lost in their creation from Chinese resin, though I think I value them less for this cultural difference—appropriation for profit, to which I am certainly contributing.

     So don’t think, boys and girls, that the material goods you collect have no social, soulful ramifications.

 

     Ersatz, it was once called.  

     And this little gnome holds one more tale to tell. He arrived in a tight box after dark in heavy winds.  I had forgotten I ordered him and ripped the packaging right off, thinking “Dispose of it NOW!”  Humph. Cute.  I set him on the doorstep and stomped down the driveway with Red, which was why I was out in the first place, to walk the dog on a cold night. A was also on the doorstep with us, holding recycling to toss; he tripped over his own foot, taking  a scary fall.  Thank God he wasn’t hurt, but Red and I booked it down the driveway for that last pm walk. When we returned, A was safely in the house.  The gnome had also fallen, but broken the tip off his pointy cap.  

     No disappointment, though.  He now does duty as a very attractive vase.

Associations

My dad, CJJ, old age, middle age, youth (just 15ish, in the Army)

     I can’t locate a computer copy of my HS photo at age 15, but I think I looked like him then.  I thought he looked like Sean Connery, as far as admired celebs go, and I attributed that to the Scots-Irish presumed in our ancestry.  

     I spent 2-3 hours using YouTube yesterday to watch shorts of handsome, favorite actors of my generation transform from youth to old age or death. AI in action.  Sean Connery was a favorite, probably because I associated him with Dad.  I was and am also particularly partial to Denzel and Morgan Freeman forever, but my current favorite is Brendan Fraser. I seem to see compassion and kindness pour out of his big blue eyes, whatever fact or fiction happens to him.  

     This might seem trivial, but no. The people in the entertainment industry, including social media and the so-called news, occupy more human headspace, at least in electrified parts of the world, than God.  Can we even imagine living through a week before 1895 when the Lumiere Brothers et al introduced motion pictures?  More than entertainment, media shapes our lives. Can we turn it off a day without getting the heebiejeebies?

          “'Cause, like Halliday said, 'reality is the only thing that's real.'”

      Doesn’t that just beat all?  My quote is Wade Watts from the movie (I never read the book), Ready Player One.  Another all time fave!