Inattentive

 

Blood 11-8-22

   I missed the blood moon this morning, and I should not have;  I was awake, but did not remember to haul out of bed or look out the window when I did. My loss.

Foolscap

July 8, 2015, Northport

I on his path, properly attired

     Who says the Chinese don’t have a sense of humor?  I found the following YouTube short to be hilarious.  The original “shows” dabble in absurdity and fun  Then one man and his helpers’ mockery  of “fashion” brings parody to perfection.  Many versions of the video exist.  Monty Python would be so proud and would add one edit  —struts only— to the Department of Silly Walks.

     I would love to know the story behind its making— where is he?  What motivated their production?  If he’s in China, any censor involvement or local social repercussions?  Where did he see the originals?  Any financial profit?  

     But the real point is, watch these on YouTube if you want a laugh, starting here.

     https://youtu.be/dlt-u4DleHs?si=GT5ST1qTpz5CSejA

Mush, puppy

 

Another snowfall, welcome March 1.

Tasty, Red says. And I have on my fur coat.

     Two webinars this morning with G and D.  I’ll report back. I think sis L started a Substack; I was invited to follow her when I was looking at LVL‘s yesterday. I’m really curious, but I’m half afraid to look at it, lest it be political haranguing.  I will check it out and get back to you (me).  Starting to sound like Beelzebub this morning, promising Hassein, I’ll tell you about that in detail later.  We all know, of course, that he almost never did.

Busy enough

 

Curiosity 

    Felt like an ordinary repetitive day yesterday, but quiet is maybe a better descriptor.  Events du jour:

    Good morning contemplation which will result in 3-27 program on Orage’s Essay 8 at PSC.

      Texts with C, I know her new plans now for housing.

   Errands to pharmacy, bank, gas station, with Red of course 

      Sunny walk in park. Bumped into R. His wife L died a year ago; he said he last saw her on March 3. I was just thinking of them last week. He gave me a big hug and said he did not think this was a random meeting. Probably right. I am often surprised by contacts with folks I haven’t seen in a while but think of them and they appear. 

     Scrabble with A in afternoon. Pretty much a tie score. Both pleased, A especially by over 500 points for us. 

      S resolved her problems with deed and bacon burger.  Everybody happy then. 

       Spoke to I about his offensive posts from a few months ago, suggesting he delete them and maybe talk to his dad.  I think they could affect future employment due to intolerant foul language.  Just hope he heeds the warning.

      Rush to PSC for two meditations after a fast supper.  D brought delicious chip bar snacks. And L gave us the happy news that he got a job like the one he lost, pJ!  His meditation repeated reminders not to discount the good we do, and I find that helpful.

        C and Nola visited last thing

        I was sleepy much of the day. 

        This reads like a “roll back the day”  exercise. OK!

Comfort or self calming?

Father…

And son, 29 years later

    Newborn E, no smiles, startled on being awakened from a sound sleep; more important to convenience the photographer than the baby, right Mom?  Goes to show wrongheaded priorities right from the beginning. So sorry, son.  But your grandma got it right with your dad, her baby, A: eyes fixed on him, a little tickle, then  rewarded with a big smile.

     So a repeating question:  Are we put on this earth to fail our children?  I just heard my father‘s voice in my head and he was saying, “I’m sorry.”  I say the same thing to my children in my head so frequently, and I think about my siblings’ children, too:  So many disastrous missteps that their  parents  -I- cannot, could not, or would not prevent. We fail to protect them from errors of their ways or our own. 

   I remember the images of sweet, smiling infants, at least photos:  E, S, I, A, C, D, L, myself,  and I cherish them.  I consider my neighbor’s uber intense efforts to shelter her daughters and admire her for them, with hopes their lives will turn out better for that all-in mother love.  

     But we all suffer. Then laugh in the face of it sometimes, or die crying.  “Bible says, dust to dust. That’s why I don’t dust; might be somebody we know.”

     And, really, I think parental guilt may be what attaches me so closely to my little dog at this time of life.  And here I thought it was love!  Well, I’ve always acknowledged my lack of clarity on love.  Tut, tut.

Who’s running this company?

Edited for the truth, moments ago

     More later. Let’s see what the day brings.  

Wakey wakey

 

Time to get up

Well, maybe five minutes more

     Snow today for another three hours.  I really enjoyed the state of the union address last night, especially the guests and medals awarded.

     I watched body count movies most of the day yesterday and finished one up today. Must say I enjoyed them though. I’m sorry to say it. We do love our violence.

Time together

During the blizzard

    No walking today, except 5 minutes down the driveway after JP shoveled, about 6:30 pm, after dark. He was still outdoors, clearing L’s driveway, I don’t know how:  that wind was brutal.  I’m thankful we never lost power.  Snow accumulation is hard to guess since wind blows the driveway practically clear but the doorway but piles it up 3 feet deep down by the street.  Phone Weather said we had 4.8 inches. That’s not so much total.

     Our  quiet time included A reading a couple of chapters of Deuteronomy to me mid morning and a Scrabble game late afternoon, partly to break up S’s phone kvetching. I won this time. He won last time, so maybe one more game tonight to beak the tie. 

     Like the Americans did Sunday at the ice hockey final?  Nah. I’m just stretching to intro that topic because we so enjoyed watching Jack with his snaggletooth grin especially, and the team, celebrate the win.   Strong young men, JP, Jack, et al:  God bless them!

Sitting it out

On the trail, 3:30 yesterday.  Storm warning?

Sure looks like it 

     Quiet, restful but not sleepy; listening to the wind  howl and the electric heater’s noise; comfortable with Red and me in our habitual positions near the stove. Sipping tea.  It’s a usual morning with a different setting.

      So is there a different taste to time, when the same events are set in a different frame?  Observe….

    I see, sense:

 -shoulder muscles are getting stiff and achy, leg muscles  are not. 

 -The thinking brain is quiet and receptive.

 -My emotions are calm and satisfied.

 -Sometimes I spontaneously observe my breathing and make it deeper, remembering that scan diagnosis, scattered atelectasis. And “in Afib 59% last week”on iPhone report.  -I don’t feel those physical conditions, but reading about them changes my emotion almost immediately to “pre” worry from calm. Hmmm

“What is Time, as we ordinarily understand it? A single track succession of events. At every given moment we are called upon to make a choice among a number of possibilities and at every such choice the unchosen possibilities are, as it were, sacrificed. Time as succession is simply the actualization of one possibility out of many in each successive moment. Could we actualize two possibilities, or three or four at once, we should be living in two or three or four different streams of time. Our life, though no longer than before, would nevertheless contain more time. We should be living several ordinary lives at once.” 

      A.R. Orage, No. 7, Psychological Essays, quoted in Lee van Laer Substack, Journal of Gurdjieff Studies, 2-20-26

Free spirit

 

Taos Pueblo, 4-3-2017

     I loved this dog as soon as I saw him in the Pueblo, and he followed me around for a while, probably because I was willing to share my fried dough with him.  No attachments or illusions between us. I noticed that Indian dogs run free in packs, so i suspect that nobody gets too attached. I’m glad he posed for this picture.

    In these days when I mostly sit home idle with no desire “to do,” I am grateful for the images, objects, and memories  that call up the active times of my life.

     And speaking of time, as in the Orage quote in yesterday’s post, I observe that time flies even faster in idleness than busyness.

     That fine canine is likely dead now, but here am I keeping its memory green, bless it.