Ok then

Last night

 915 and big pop,  L saw a big flash JG Said transformer is out. So no electricity for a while. Fixed in about 85 minutes  

(From Gwynne) Rodney Collins, Mirror of Light excerpt applies to Ibrahim incident: 

“We are connected with everyone we have met or talked to or felt, because we have given them part of ourselves - our irradiations. It is not performance but irradiations that matter. Our reactions are physical;  we have to make them positive. If we think of ourselves everything goes wrong. If we forget ourselves we can do right. We cannot love everybody, but we are here to project harmony. If we have harmony we grow. To collect positiveness we must love people, really love them. Just love them. Everyone is in need of love; it is spiritual food. When we love people we give them our flesh and blood. Blood is emanations, flesh means our real self. 

To love is not an emotion nor a sensation nor an idea; it is the particular kind of irradiation that only a certain type of action can produce in us.

If a person feels affection for someone but is too lazy to help him, he does not love him. On the other hand a person may feel very irritated with someone, but if in spite of his impatience he makes an effort to help him, that is loving him. He projects to him irradiations that probably are of more help than his action, but which can only be set in motion by action with the intention to help. The only way to love our neighbour as ourself to learn how to com-municate with God. Then we have the grace to love both our neighbour and ourself.All functions are biological. Just as thebody functions are biological, so emotions have a biological basis. There are two kinds of negativeness. The kind that comes frominside is meanness; this is bad. But the negativeness that comes from outside is reaction; this is not bad. Often when we react irritably it is because we have an accumulation of body acids that need to be eliminated. We need to have an elimination of these acids at least once a week, in anger or tears or strong laughter. The mistake is when we identify ourselves with these eliminations and mix them with feelings. It is wrong to stop anyone from this kind of elimination; it does them harm in the same way it would do harm to stop a physical elimination. Babies are very wise; they know about this. They will cry till they are red in the face. Mothers should not pick them up till they have finished, though they must not be left to cry too long or they will form the habit. We must learn how to get rid of our emotional waste. Once aweek we should run, shout, laugh, cry, put it out of us. We should get rid of our physical reactions, but not against other people. We must know the difference between physical reactions, and feelings. We must never hurt anybody; apart from that it does not matter how we work off our emotional waste. When we have eliminated it we will be clean.

The cleaner we are outside the cleaner inside. If we are clean the pores of the skin are ready to get rid of adds and we will be more healthy. Cleanliness depends on how we were brought up. We have to be clean as a base, to be virile, strong. Our housesshould be clean. There is a Russian saying: 'Where there is dust there is a devil'. God only comes into clean things. When we understand cleanliness we have to cultivate neatness. We should always be aware of neatness, for it helps very much with self-respect. After neatness comes smartness, a combination of quality, suitability and fashion that is within the reach of everyone with taste and intelligence. It does not of necessity mean being dressed in the latest fashion, for often fashion means making oneself look ridiculous in order not to be thought ridiculous.

When instead of saying: 'I feel so lazytoday', we turn our lethargy intopositiveness by saying: 'I must dosomething to get out of this', we find that we have more energy than if we gave in to it. We must try to convert our negativeness into positiveness. We must make everythingpositive by our wish, by our strength, by our efforts. If there is one person who is depressed in a gathering of people he can make everyone else depressed too.”

Ibrahim the rude

 

Something else ugly 9-17-26 Webster park

So I’ve made it a goal to declutter something every day. Yesterday and today I took down all the old picture frames from the garage and a few other items and bagged them for Goodwill.  Baggy old snaggletoothed Ibrahim was collecting from the cars today. He asked what the frames were and announced all this stuff was trash.  Trash?!! I told him I bought most of it here except those loose frames cost me $300 even if they need to be put together. Artists buy them.  Later I wished I had told him, they must take trash; they took you. I kept thinking about the rumor. Shekinah wants to start a “go back to your country” T-shirt line, too.

Glad I turned the other cheek instead. But Lord have mercy on all of us!  You really love us, fools that we all are, Some Announcing out loud, others keeping their meanness inside. 

Nought to say yet

 

Don’t have to go far to find glory

So peaceful I hear a goose honking and Red barking and the 6 or 8th. Airplane takeoff. Grant them all safe journeys and thanks again for the FlyDubai save

  Evening now and I’m very tired. If I ask, where is my sensation now it’s in all pains in my shoulders and feet and lower back and neck  Doesn’t feel like any glory there just a sense of getting old and having I’m not very good heart pumping low energy all the time it seems like

  I fixed chowder tonight and it was not all that good and a lot of work  The cod fell apart, totally. My two cans of evaporated milk we’re outdated so I had to run to the local convenience store which fortunately I just opened on Monday to see if they have anything  They have an offbrand half-and-half, which I bought, and which tasted like an offbrand, which I boiled anyway  I enjoyed meeting the young Indian man working behind the counter. He said he is from Surat, A diamond city,  and I looked up where it is.  In the crease on eastern half of the Country although he said it was north. He says it’s not too hot, nice river. Wiki post looked good. 

   No PSC tonight. I’m too tired to be there anyway  But I wonder what the alternative meeting they said was being held i.

New car for now

 

Picking up car rental 

Odd foggy am melted away to beautiful summery day. I was in Afib and awake. 4:30-7:09 am approximately. Contacted D about making end of life plans. Will see her about 10-9 or 10. Business with Caliber Collision including Enterprise car rental on which they dropped the ball but recovered by giving me another person’s rental, agreeing she was late and only needed her mirror repaired. I didn’t feel so good about that especially after I saw her  She reminded me of C and how she always gets taken advantage of because of people’s class assumptions. I heard them confirming with her that she did not need a rental, however, and they would fix her mirror immediately that day  I left it that way however and just hope everything worked out OK  JG was with me. We stopped at BJ’s and bought pie and cookies and salad   He said he can take a look at my old toys and maybe sell them for me  That would be good. He was very talkative about his personal life too. 

Active morning

 

160 even, but not a pretty sight

(Not nude, if you’re wondering)

Now I’m a bit tired   Texted JC   Called DL regarding clearing out my mineral collection.  Decluttered CPAP equipment. Lordy, I should not have to order another thing for a year!  

    JG s Visit with A for the Red Sox game last made ME so happy!  Listening to them converse just lit up my heart Before I fell asleep To their sounds. It reminded me of feelings from parties, and I don’t know the last time I was at a party, especially here at home. 

It’s raining again. 

Yikes

 

Street detritus. Rust  today

Accomplished all the tasks on today’s to do list. Feels great. But I’m tired. A bit dizzy a couple of times in the last two hours. Notifications said I was in Afib 70% Of the time last week. Last week it said 50% of the week before. Yikes indeed. And Dr L said I was in a fib during my exam a couple of weeks ago.  But my cardiologist don’t seem to take these readings too seriously over the past year ; not sure whether to call them or not. I really am afraid of heart attack., like at 4am in bed in Orono  9-17.  I will probably call but must deal with the car Thursday. I’m also worried/afraid I may lose my drivers license and have no driver in the house. Lord help me!  

Que sera, sera

 

Abed.  Now

More rain all day. Yesterday and today. Red doesn’t love it. But it has its pleasant quietude.

Lee says today, and I hope he’s right:

I see that despite my inadequacy, 

I am penetrated by love. 

It has come here to help. 

Japanese decluttering advice:

  The special occasion you’re waiting for is the day you are already in  ( Use it or dispose it

   Do not let your stuff become someone else’s burden

     

Not so bad so far

Milkweed pod at 5Guys Thursday 

Beware that mixture of boredom, fear and depression

A woman pulled out her car in front of me on Main Street yesterday day and just stared right into my eyes as if daring me to say a word. How word and ironic after Thursday crash

Gray day

Field full of little kids recreating 

Waters tranquil

Lots of rain and possibly a northeaster predicted. We went to the park and bought Subway for lunch not much of a walk, but very satisfying S reports she’s doing well today

We need this now? Really?

Samaeo M

Met an African with a crippled foot in an unexpected and sorry way.  T-boned at a four way stop.  I took the blame. I ran a stop sign. BUT. He was turning left and did not see me?  Why was I talking for him to the officer?  Because of his stearner demeanor?  He was trying to help me, I think, but I wasn’t getting the hints at the time. ME has some law about at fault if you can stop an accident but don’t, I think. I did not get a citation so far. But could I lose my license?We’ll see. Filed claims while we waited for police. Spoke to HM rep today .  Will go with JG to auto body shop Monday. Caliber on Forest Ave. 

   I really want to stop driving, but not going places.